A Personal Trainer Can Help With Disasters of Resolution Failures in 5 Simple Ways…

It’s almost the end of the year, so within the next couple of weeks most of us will be making our resolutions for next year. Even as a personal trainer and health coach I make them too!

personal training can help you reach your new year's goals
making personal goals with a coach

As of this month I’ve been coaching for seven years. 

At the studios, the studios are usually packed every January first with people with New Year’s resolutions. Then, by the middle to the end of January the studio dies down to back to normal numbers with a few new faces continuing on, but lots gone. 

What happens during those first 2 or 3 weeks of January?

Why is it so hard to stick to our New Year’s resolutions especially with fitness?

It is estimated that over 95% of us fail at our New Year’s resolutions. By fail I mean, failing = giving up. 

Here are the top 5 reasons why we fail at our fitness resolutions.

1. Overwhelm: we overload ourselves with too many resolutions. We have fitness goals, nutrition goals, financial goals, relationship goals, we have goals for our spouse and even for our kids. We simply can’t handle that many serious goals.

Studies show that when we try to take on more than one life-changing goal at a time our success rate is near nil. We simply don’t have the necessary will power and energy to focus on more than one at a time.

Fortunately, willpower is like a muscle, it gets stronger as we use it But it also is finite. Overload it and you’ll run out too fast as well. 

Solution: simplify and commit to one big goal. Once that goal becomes a habit and it doesn’t take so much energy and will power to complete, then you can start working on a different resolution.

2. Lack of a plan: When one creates a resolution without a plan they lack direction and step to get there. Just like those with fitness goals going into a gym for their first time; walking around not knowing what to do next. There was no order or direction to their workout. The workout was purely left to chance.

The cardio deck, however, is always packed. This happens for a couple of reasons. One, it’s the default form of exercise especially for those that don’t feel comfortable lifting weights. And, I get it. It’s a lot easier figuring out how to set up the treadmill than designing a strength training workout and figuring out lifting technique.

And, reason number two, many people still falsely believe cardio to be the best form of exercise for fat loss despite dozens of studies pointing out how ineffective it is and that it is often counterproductive (people can actually get fatter from doing cardio). I see this in the studios a lot when women who have worked out for months complain that their body hasn’t changed even though they are working out so hard doing all these cardio classes. 

Solution: hire a trainer to set you up on a program, or at the worst find a program online that targets the same goal you have and then watch some YouTube videos to learn technique.

3. Unrealistic expectations: We live in an extremely fast paced world. We can cue up any movie or TV show and watch it at any time. We can literally order anything in the world and have it shipped to us “next day “. We’re impatient, we want our perfect body and we want it yesterday.

Setting unrealistic goals is a dead end road. Instead of a goal being motivating, the goal becomes demoralizing and shame full. Week in and week out we beat ourselves up because we’re not hitting our numbers. So, of course, after a few weeks of that we’re gonna throw in the towel.

Solution: Hire a trainer. With their experience they can guide you to realistic expectations. Also, when setting a goal ask yourself how confident are you that you can accomplish it. If you’re not 90-100% confident that you can do it then modify it to the point that you are at least 90% confident.

Another part of being realistic is to expect plateaus. Nobody gets consistent progress week in and week out. There will be setbacks. Accept this fact and the road accomplishing your new year’s resolution will be a lot more enjoyable.

4. Skipping the goal setting process: “If you fail to plan, plan to fail.”

When talking to my clients about goals we talk about 3 types of goals: outcome goals, behavioral goals and purpose goals. When we first meet we will talk about these three types of goals. 

At bare minimum you need to decide “what” it is that you’re trying to accomplish and then commit it to paper.

A goal gives you direction and writing it down helps hold you accountable while motivating you at the same time.

“An arrow without a target always hits its mark.” If you have vague goals your results will be vague as well.

So.. get super specific with your goals and review them daily.

Solution: carve out 20 minutes to visualize your goals and commit them in detail to paper. Then, review them daily. Remember to keep them simple and break them down #1 and #2 from above. 

5. No accountability: Personal accountability is an oxymoron. By definition, you can not hold yourself accountable. There has to be a second person involved, a second person to which you report. Otherwise, it’s human nature to slack.

Accountability is the number one thing new clients ask me to do for them. It is usually why they hire me as their trainer or coach. 

They want me to make sure they make it to their workouts and follow through with their nutrition goals.

Even without a trainer, studies have shown that just having a workout buddy can make a positive difference on consistency with your fitness goals.

Solution: hire a trainer to hold you accountable or at the very least find a buddy to hit the gym with and report to each other on your nutrition.

I teach my clients to make things effortless. Then they don’t have to think about winning, it is already set up for them. So for you, almost all of these five mistakes can be resolved by enlisting the help of a trainer or coach.

I believe this is a life lesson that crosses over to all aspects of life.

If you want to improve your golf swing, hire a golf pro.

If you want to get out of debt and prepare for retirement, hire a financial planner.

If you want to start a new business, hire a business coach.

The point is you don’t have to recreate the wheel with your fitness. An experienced trainer has “been there, done that” and they can get you to your goal in the shortest time possible.

Speaking of hiring a personal trainer or coach, I’d love to be yours. 

It fixes all of the above mistakes and you’ll create the lifestyle that you envision for a healthy, happy life. 

You will get world class training, nutrition coaching and accountability. And right now, I am offering a discounted rate going into the new year. 

Follow this link to learn more. But hurry because my training and coaching spots fill in so fast. 

Stay Fit

Strategies to Breakthrough PMDD Luteal Phase Episodes + Addictions

***We do not claim to be a doctor or anything of the like. This document is for educational purposes only. Any action taken by the reader is their sole responsibility and should be done with discretion. No claim can be made against Adagio FIT or its employees. If you ever have any questions, take them to your primary care doctor.***

There is a fine balance between what is in my heart that I want to share and what you need for your journey. I question and ponder until those two overlap and can share that overlap. 

Here’s my overlap today…

Women with PMDD go through a point each month in which behaviors are very “addict” like. What does this mean?

Well, our frontal lobe is the rational decision making and emotional regulation area of our brain. During PMDD episodes (usually around days 13-15 and 23-28 or a female cycle) the frontal lobe checks out. The cause is unknown to why this happens but it is like neurotransmitters to not make it past that synapse. Either way, it happens and the frontal lobe becomes a mass of lazy tissue for lack of a better explanation. 

Because of this, our Limbic system then takes over or at least most to solo operation mode… this is the emotion and hormone driven area of the brain (to simplify). That need for a dopamine hit overrides everything. 

This can lead, as I am sure you can deduct already, to behaviors and decisions that aren’t in line with a true, whole self. Usually compulsiveness in myriads of ways – from emotional outbursts to binge eating of junk foods to frantic cleaning of house and home to overspending. It has been related to me like someone being addicted to drugs, alcohol or pronography. Ever had those insatiable cravings for anything? Oreos? Oh the whole sleeve? Oh just one more? Ugh, might as well finish the whole package. Sound familiar?

Now, for me, I really dislike being placed with those kinds of people. Why? I am not addicted to anything via choices I made and I didn’t choose to have PMDD, but being honest, my actions, left unchecked, will show the same behaviors 100%. 

In the Book of Mormon (a book of scripture in my religion), there is a passage that says “And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.” Ether 12:27

Why do we have weakness? Weakness requires us to reach out to other people, rely on a higher being/plan, and to help us grow into our full, truest self. Not that I want to have a weakness or anything. I am super independent, full of determination, and excellence… those don’t line up with being weak in any area.

But having weakness requires us to surrender and accept. To work with it, not against it. PMDD won’t magically disappear as I prayed for so long.

How do I, and you, work with PMDD? 

I tell you, it is SO painful to come out on the other side of a PMDD week and realize you have to start back at square one and even to deal with the consequences of my simply stupid choices — like the stomach ache, 5lbs, lethargy and bloat from ALL the sweets I could get my hands on. Yikes. So as much as I don’t want to, I do need a plan to manage symptoms. So do you!

A successful plan requires three things —

  1. Help
  2. Spirituality
  3. Strategies

First, help. 

Help is hard. Yep. Mic drop. LOL. 

Ask for help from trusted sources – family, friends, therapist, doctors, etc. 

Having a conversation with my hubby and kids and laying out the help I needed from them was not easy the first time. In fact, my hubby and I went to bed on opposite sides that first time. But with practice, it has become routine and a bit easier at times. I have more courage through taking accountability instead of avoiding and expecting. 

Every month before my luteal phase I tell them next week I won’t feel good. Then I ask my kids and hubby for help to keep things extra clean, make dinners, and pretty much take care of eachother. Also, that instead of always relying on mom, there is a dad home (especially on weekends). 

I’ve also asked friends to take my kids for a couple of hours to allow me to have quiet time and peace. And, yes, I have asked technology to give me some quiet time too 🙂 Either way, asking can be hard but if you don’t ask, the answer is always NO. 

Second is spirituality. Another word could be the value of faith. This is a belief that there is a plan for you and that there are powers or a being who can see the whole picture. That all will workout for your good. You can find this helpful by connecting to those powers. That may be yoga, scripture reading, meditation, getting out in the mountains, etc. 

Finally we hit strategies. This gets the biggest portion from me today. Probably because it is what I am working on. 

You MUST plan and prepare these strategies BEFORE you hit your PMDD days or any sort of issue you want to work on, right? This is so applicable to more than just PMDD. 

Get out a piece of paper and fill out the following strategies. I have included some prompt questions and examples to get you thinking. 

  1. Goals
    1. Make a list of goals you want to accomplish when you come out of your week or past your trigger time. Examples could be:
      1. Staying the same weight
      2. Not going into CC debt
      3. Staying off of social media
  2. Restriction Strategies
    1. These are strategies of abstinence. Not even one. Nope. Not you. 
    2. What do you need to remove from your vision and mind?
    3. What are your triggers? 
      1. Credit card autofill?
      2. Leftover Halloween Candy?
      3. The weekly cookie shop email?
      4. Walking into the kitchen?
  3. Replacement Strategies
    1. What can you allow yourself instead?
    2. What behaviors does your higher self implement when the days are good?
    3. What can you do to be productive and useful to give you a sense of purpose?
      1. Call 4 friends
      2. Pre-packaged salads
      3. Some fresh berries for a snack
      4. A new book or class online for the time
      5. More exercise
      6. Walking on the treadmill while watching a movie
  4. Mindset Strategies
    1. Cravings of any kind can narrow your focus to all that you don’t have. 
    2. How can you broaden your view to bring peace and settling?
      1. Any practice of gratitude
      2. Move to what you have and not what you lack
      3. Look at good times in your life — chatbooks, phone images, etc?
  5. Structure Strategies
    1. Some people need to have structure to be able to keep their thinking clear. So weekends with a different schedule can put a wedge in your ability to stay true to your goals. 
    2. What rituals and routines help you feel accomplished at the end of the day? 
      1. Making your bed
      2. Exercising
      3. Getting ALL cleaned up
      4. A good breakfast for yourself
    3. I asked my hubby to not plan anything or ask anything of me on Saturdays until noon. This allows me to accomplish what my mind and body need to feel even just a bit more focused and better. 

This paper is now your plan and now you can write out the next things you need to do in a preparation list. 

This is my general list for each month and I tweak where needed.

Preparations:

  • Remind my family days in advance and ask for help where needed
  • Set goals for the week
  • Tell my family those goals
  • Have them check in with me often to see if I am staying strong
  • Allow them to remind me about my goals
  • Meal plan and prep snack boxes before day 23
  • Find a good book or find a class to take
  • Plan an artistic project to undertake

As you can kind of see, you want to create a space that you feel productive, useful, contributive, and peaceful during the luteal phase. You want to come out not needing to pick up shattered pieces and you want to feel dignified and accomplished that you made it through. 

This may take practice to find what works and what balance you need for your family circumstances…. I mean, I’d like to just go to a resort for 5 days a month and have my own chef. But that isn’t in our cards right now… 

This takes accountability and action NOW instead of waiting. It takes communication and preparation. It is hard work but really worth it. It may save your marriage, your relationships with your kids, and especially with yourself. 

If you have any questions about this or would like to sort this out with help, I am happy to schedule a coaching call with you. Shoot me an inquiry at https://adagiofit.com/trainwithme/contact-us/